We love, we cry, we fall, we rise...we are WOMAN.
More often than not, we celebrate the light and the beauty, never really stopping to take a moment to see that there would be no beauty without the pain, there would be no conquering without the courage that fear pushes us into, and there would be no light to shine through us without darkness beside it.
We women are beautifully complex creatures of the Earth who ebb and flow with the ever changing Seasons, rising and falling emotionally through the days, the weeks, and the months, never truly knowing who we are or where our emotions will take us next.
Before I found the the great healing power of Mother Earth (or rather before She found me) I hadn’t embraced the full beauty and strength of what true surrender means, forever letting my emotions rule over me. although I still feel i’m lacking control at times, I now know more than ever that to surrender is to accept the truth of how things are, not how we want them to be, and by accepting the truth this then actually gives us greater power over any emotions or situations, with a deeper clarity in our hearts.
I used to fight my shadows, turn away from my shadows, my hurt, my mistakes, my tears, until I truly Awoke to the truth which is;
‘Everything wants to be seen, acknowledged, and loved…Especially our pain’
They say ‘energy flows where attention goes’, this is true, but don’t think by giving energy to your pain that it will increase. Don’t believe that focusing on the shadows will make things worse. It all comes down to what the energy flow is and where it’s coming from; A place of love, or a place of fear.
The truth is, as long as the energy you are giving your pain comes from a deep intention of understanding, acceptance, forgiveness, love, and compassion, then giving your pain some ‘quality time’ may be just the thing your heart needs to let go and move forward. Think about it; How many times have you shared and felt able to release the emotional poison coursing through you simply because someone gave you their time to really hear you?
Fear is another huge part of the Shadow self, always getting a bad name, but how ‘bad’ is fear really?…
Fear has been part of us for centuries and is actually a hugely essential part of our survival. It is deeply innate within each of us, our primal ‘birth right’. Your fear is the first thing to let you know there is true danger about, it will rise in your energy to give you a warning. Unfortunately, when we then feel fear rising up again through venturing into the unknown, we automatically believe ‘something’ must be wrong, which is not always the case.
Over the years, I’ve came to befriend fear, understanding that when it rises within us is for two main reasons;
• A warning of impending danger that something is wrong and we need to act fast and listen,
• A signal that we’re about to do something truly courageous which is a doorway for us to grow.
How you decided which is which comes down to how aware you are of yourself. Building a deeper relationship with fear will help you in the ‘knowing’ of when it’s a warning, or when it’s a signal for incredible growth.
Like all our shadows, fear isn’t there to hurt us or keep us stuck, it’s here to fuel our energy - guiding us either to safety, or into our greatness. Fear is what gives us the fire to overcome our obstacles, helping create our courage which then goes into building our inner strength, and it’s only through our courage and built resilience that we can then begin to grow into our greatest selves. Something that just wouldn’t be possible without that initial whisper from fear.
Often then not, we look to our pain, our fears, and our shadows with an energy of hate, resentment, or bitterness, trying our best to ignore it, as this world has taught us to ignore ‘bad behaviour’, but all this does is turn those quite whispers into loud screams, then births more of this energy within our whole being, when really we should be embracing them when they arise, hearing their sadness, and even asking;
‘What are you trying to tell me?’
‘Why are you feeling so sad?’
(sometimes looking at our pain objectively can actually help us understand it more).
Then, take some time to give ourselves what we need, whether it’s alone time, a day snuggled up watching films, a walk in Nature, a time for crying and releasing, or simply writing down our thoughts.
I’m giving you permission to just stop! It’s OK to sometimes do nothing except be however you are in this very moment, reminding yourself that the pain you are currently experiencing is a very normal part of your journey, and that ‘this too shall pass’, because It always does.
So, embrace the shadows, love them, forgive them, understand them, and dance with them lovingly in your arms, because sometimes, that’s all they need.